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To make the irony even sweeter, the bomber had hidden himself in a cluster of men holding signs that read ‘England Get Out of Ireland.’ This is too easy, he thought to himself. Fr. Frank slipped off his cardboard roman collar and took out a pen, scribbled a message on it, then reached in between the parade goers to slap it high on the man’s back, just below his neck. The terrorist couldn’t feel it through the fat suit. The priest wasn’t even ten feet away when he heard the sounds of a man being beaten into a new incarnation. Maybe I should have found something more tame to write on his back than ‘I hate the IRA.’ The next one, a block over, was taken down with medical precision. Frank slipped up behind the terrorist, who was dressed in a Fighting Irish jacket so new the price tag was still on it, and disarmed him with two slashes of the scissors—one across the buttocks and another just below the scapula. The first slash started emptying the suit of liquid explosive, and the second. Thank you, Jessie. What would we do without you to help us here?" Don't know, sir, but I'm glad to still be here." You've been on this property longer than I have, Jessie. Catherine and I would really hate to lose you." I've practically grown up on this land, Mr. Carl. Would feel strange if I was any place else." Just how old are you now, Jessie?" Pushing 70 now, sir." Well, for a man your age, it doesn't show. You've kept yourself in great shape. Wish I could say the same for me."Once again the two men shared a laugh."Guess sitting behind a desk all day doesn't do much for the exercise, does it?" he stated, as he gently patted his growing mid-section." And here I thought it was all that cock sucking that was keeping you lean and trim, sir!"As Carl headed towards the house his laughter echoed back into the barn.Carl decided that the time to tell his wife about Neptune was right after they'd finished their dinner.Once they were settled in the living room, watching their favorite show.
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